Ephiphany & The Swords of Damocles

It’s four-thirty in the morning and I can’t sleep because it’s still hot, even with the fan in the window and the overhead running. I haven’t got a clue what I’m going to write this morning, and I’ve got two big projects waiting for me at work when I get there. Just like swords dangling, preventing the peasant (me) from resting easy.

Do you know the story of the Sword of Damocles? You’ve probably heard of it, it’s a great little story. In fact, I’ll tell you what I remember of it (it’s been a while so give me a break if you remember different).

There’s this king, see, and he’s got all the kingly problems every king has. Then there’s Damocles, a peasant. He’s outside the castle bitching and moaning and going on and on about what a jerk the king is, how he has it so easy. The king gets tired of hearing all of this stuff, so he has his guards bring the peasant into the castle.

“You think I’ve got it easy, huh?”

“Yep.”

“Well, I don’t. If you’ll join me for dinner tomorrow evening, I’ll explain.”

“Sure, it’s a date.”

Damocles shows up for dinner the next day and there’s a fabulous feast spread out on the table. His mouth is watering. He’s never seen such a spread. But, there’s a bit of a problem. There’s only one chair at the table. Hanging over that chair by a single horsehair is a sword, point down.

“See, Damocles,” says the king, “that sword is like my problems. One little shift, one wrong move and boom it’s all she wrote. Those guys out there, that army on the other side of the border? They’re a problem. I’ve got to feed and clothe my army to defend against them. My soldiers need weapons and…” The king tells Damocles all the headaches he has and Damocles gets it. It isn’t easy being king.

Now, if anyone ever talks to you about the sword of Damocles, you’ll know what it’s about (and you can Google it, if you want – but that’s the gist).

Anyway, back to me and my world. So I’ve got these swords of Damocles and…

Both of these projects “have” to be done by tomorrow, and both are HUGE given the time constraints – each probably at least six or eight hours apiece.

On one I did hedge and told the director requesting it, ‘I’ll do my best’. That’s all anyone can do, so I got started yesterday, got sidetracked by an emergency from another director, but have clear direction. Now, if MS Project will just cooperate, I’ll be fine. It might not be 100%, but I can probably get it to 75% or so, without too much sweat.

See the deal there is that MS Project is being difficult. It keeps crashing. Of course, the fact that I have a file that’s about 100MB doesn’t help. But it crashes and I lose what people have told me about – their task updates – and we all get frustrated. I don’t like being frustrated. I don’t like other people being frustrated. Something has got to change. So I talked to our IT guys and we came up with an idea that might solve the problem.

We’ll take this monster project and break it into three pieces but, of course, it’s not that simple.

Knowing this thing was going to be massive and a problem from the start, I began by creating one file into which I linked each department’s tasks from separate, department specific files. For the past eighteen months or so, it worked well. The data was added to the master file and filtered through to the linked child table. Then it got too big and here we are.

So somehow I’ve got to collect all of the data from all of the tables into one new table from which I will create three separate tables that include elements from each, but it’s not that easy.

I can’t do a save as because there’s no single table to save – there are nine tables, all separate and discrete except for their linkage through the master table. That means I have to copy and paste all of the records from all of the tables into a new table, and make sure they’re in the same order so no one gets confused.

Then I have to verify the data, line by line, to make sure that nothing got lost in the translation, and then I have to make sure that the people and departments responsible still have the responsibility assigned to them in the new table. Meaning I have to recreate the two custom fields I created in the master table, and replicate that data, too.

It’s not rocket science. It’s just challenging and time consuming. Then, once I get that done, I need to do a save as to create one table for the immediate need, another save as for the longer-term goals and a third for the completed tasks. We want to see those completed tasks, to be able to look in the rear-view and see where we’ve been, but they don’t need to be shown in either the current project or long-term goal tables.

I’ve been asked to have that done by tomorrow. Hmm. Dunno if it’s possible but since I hedged, and since I have a clear idea of how to get from here to there, I’ll back-burner it. Set it aside and work on the other, more pressing project.

This is that training I’ve been working on. You know, the PowerPoint with the voice over with which I’ve been struggling.

I never did get the voice over done, which is just as well. I discovered on Tuesday that I have to take what I’ve created, stand it on its head and make it waltz in a different direction because Perception and Reality have not been aligning.

Months ago, our company auditors came in, poked around, saw we had some things but not others and said, ‘you have to get this under control!’

That’s where I come in. I have been tasked with Document Control – which is cool. I like stuff like this. The idea of me doing this surfaced a few months ago after the audit and the discussion of bringing someone in from outside was tossed about and discarded. My participation was kicked around, firmed up, sent through the mill and came out the other side with a stamp of approval. Now I need to introduce it to everyone, but not everyone is thrilled.

The lack of thrill isn’t in the concept, really. I discovered the other day that it’s in the way the concept was introduced. There’s a misconception that requires clarity.

One of the company directors, not the one driving this train, another one, doesn’t see the need. They’ve been clear that they’re less than thrilled and have been, quite honestly, dragging their heels. That was until the other day, when we both had an epiphany.

We were sitting across the table from one another in a meeting with their team when the subject came up again. They said, ‘they’re taking over the world!’ and I said, ‘no we’re not. We’re just here to make sure the world fits the standard.’

See – that’s all it was – a perceptual difference of opinion.

They had not clearly stated their concerns or cause for reluctance, and I had not clearly stated what it really is all about. We both thought we were clear, but the prism between us was refracting The Light of Comprehension in different directions.

So, I explained. ‘No, it is not about me taking over and doing this. It is about me looking at what you create and making sure it fits the standard that’s being set. I can help you, but it’s still your job.’

Epiphany!

But, because of the perceptual difference there, in someone integral to the original discussions, I realized that I have got to make the prism shift crystalline so everyone sees the light. That leaves me with the immediate pressing task of turning this puppy on its head, and making it waltz in that different direction.

I got started yesterday – changing the title slide and starting to re-work the script. But I have got to have it done by tomorrow when I have been asked to do a walk-through for the director charged with getting this going. But that’s okay, too. It will give me a chance to walk through it, to think about what I’m saying, how it’s being said, and seeing how (if) it flows. It will give me greater comfort if I know it’s ready.

Game plan for this: print out what I have in the PowerPoint and the script. Identify the broad strokes that will clarify the goal and then focus down through layers. In the end, everyone has to understand why we’re doing this, how we’re doing this, and what our final goal is so that the process is easy to follow.

Once I get that done, I’ll put both the slide show and the script back together and get it ready for tomorrow by running through it by myself a few times, to make sure it flows, is smooth and conveys what I need it to convey. From there, I’ll have to find a quiet place – not the conference room – where I can do the voice over so we’ll have a training deck ready to go. Maybe back to Plan B - my bedroom over the weekend. Whatever, that can come later, in the final bars of the puppy's waltz.

This should be a fun day – I’m looking forward to it! Hope yours is half as exciting!

Best~

Philippa

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