It's Just Life - So It's Okay

I grumped the other day, and then I whined, and now things are back under control. Sort of. I'm pretending, anyway.

Really, things haven't changed. I'm just accepting that there are certain things I can affect and others I can't. If I can't affect them, worrying and fretting and grumping and whining won't change them. It just diminishes my pleasure in other things. I'll let them go.

It's cold here today. It was cold enough overnight that the road crews were out spreading sand over the roadways. When I came over the ridge and started down into Calistoga there was snow on the palisades above town. Not a lot - just a touch here and there in the shadows, and Mt. St. Helena looked a bit paler than usual - not her usual dusky self.

We are supposed to get "rain" here, although it's so cold it probably won't rain. If we do get precipitation, it will probably come down as snow - a light dusting would be all since we're so low in altitude and relatively near the coast. That'll no doubt be enough, though. Enough to get us Californians seriously messed up and in the ditch because most people around here haven't a clue how to drive safely in the rain (slow down and leave more space between you and the other guys). The snow, if we get any, will be a real adventure (slow down even more and leave a lot more space between you and the other guys).

I did get good news and satisfaction today, so that's a plus.

The project about which I was grumping the other day is done and turned in. That's the satisfaction.

The good news is that the carpet I've ordered for the conference room here will be delivered and installed on Wednesday - in time for year end. Another bit of good news came via e-mail - a release from an obligation that is a rather pleasant surprise considering surrounding circumstance.

Now, I have a couple of phone calls to make, and get the year-end billing wrapped up (yeah, good luck with that!). But! If I get those done this week will be off to a good start.

It looks like our vendors want to get their year-end billing wrapped up, too. I got a boatload of paper today - all of which need to be reviewed and coded and entered and passed along. By ten o'clock tomorrow morning.

(So why are you writing this, Phil? Because I'm on my lunch hour, silly.)

Besides, whatever doesn't get processed (I'll take care of the big ones first) will be accrued - just like every other business.

Then I get to turn my attentions to The Stack. It's the pile anyone who works has. It's the catch-all and I don't care if it's an In-Tray, a Pending Box or just a corner of the desk, it's The Stack since you, just as I, probably deal with the easy stuff first. I don't even have an In-Tray because it's going to be The Stack whether or not it's contained. So I let it spread out and get comfy until I get to it.

Most of it will be straightforward. It's just those documents - a hefty portion - that are written in Asian characters. I haven't a clue whether it's Japanese, a form of Chinese (I have some documents from both Taiwan and Mainland China) or Korea - but I have to group them together somehow. That'll be interesting and that's the thing that's really kept me from diving into The Stack before now.

Unfortunately for me, my Stack is inherited and I'm not quite sure what it includes. Some of it I'm familiar with because I put it there after touching it and looking at it. A lot of it, though, arrived in the same boxes in which it's sitting. Someone left, I get The Stack from their desk. Someone moved, I get The Stack from their cube. Then there are the hefty portion that are in Asian characters. Hmm. If it were French or Italian or even Cyrillic I might stand a chance - change my keyboard and start entering letters (typing) and see what comes up and match, then translate. Unfortunately, with the similarities between the several and my total lack of code deciphering skills...

Last week I dreamed I would have this week to whittle The Stack down to size. Hah! Then I got my project. Then I thought, "Yay!" Then I got the mail. "Damn."

Oh well. That is the Truth about Stacks. Never mind if you clear it up this week, it will start to regrow (kind of like a mold or something) next week. It's like dust - inevitable and self-recurring.

As for me and my other world, I'm giving it over. I cannot keep worrying about things over which I have no control. If I can control it, even a little, I can fix it. If I can't, then worrying is a waste of time, attention and energy. I'll set it aside and deal with it when the time comes.

I even wrote a little (about two hundred words) this weekend. The first time I've felt like writing anything in several weeks, so maybe there is a bright horizon out there. We'll see.

In the meantime, I'm going to get started on the billing and then dive into The Stack.

Have a lovely day!

Best~
Philippa

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Donna's Been Shoved Into The Closet

I'm tired of whining, so I'm going to try to shove Donna Downer into the closet where she belongs, and focus on good things.

This morning I got an early start to my day, much earlier than usual. The sauna was in full sway, so I lost some weight, I think, and have the opportunity to get a few extra hours in.

I played a couple of games of Farm Heroes. I went to the writer's sites and checked out what's happening there. I checked my blog and read and just messed around. Then I decided to get up and start on this. Extra time so no pressure.

Yesterday was good. We got more of the house cleared out and have only the living room, dining room, kitchen and family room to go. Hubby said he's already gone through some of the stuff in the family room, so progress is being made. The pile in the garage attests to that.

My coffee has just about stopped dripping. That'll be nice. The best part of waking up and so on.

I did manage to spend some time on my story yesterday, but I'm back near the start instead of where I want to pick it apart. Thinking about it, I'm not sure what the hang-up is, but I've decided to do something not outlined in the other day's blog post. It will be similar to, and be a compendium of, but not one or the other or part of two.

This weekend also saw another entry in the Flash Fiction arena. A response to the prompt 'warm up' and it was well received. Not a whole lot of votes, but a respectable number, so I'm pleased.

It was a story about... well, heck, I'll let you read it for yourself, and then I'll go off and start working on 'Shady' because I'm having second thoughts about some of what I added (does it add to the story and move it forward? No. So what am I going to do about it? I don't know. I need to think about it.)

* * * * *

The Student

Sheila tipped her head back with a sigh, closed her eyes and rubbed her hands over her face. She was more than exhausted. She was running on fumes and it was still three days before her midterms. Between her job and school, sleep was a precious commodity, indeed. In the other room, the clock chimed – once. Outside, from the window to the streetlights, it was pitch black.

“Well, I’m not doing anyone any good, now.” Pushing the chair back, she stood, turned out the desk lamp and staggered across to the bed, collapsing across it without taking time to remove her robe.

* * * * *

“Time.” The proctor looked around at the small group, noting the long, drawn faces, and smiled. He had been there, years before and had no pity for the latest crop. “Put down your pencils and pass your test books, notes and scorecards to the front. Then you may leave.”

Next to her, Wren slid her hand to about shoulder height. “Excuse me, sir?”

“Yes?”

“When will the test results be posted?”

“Next Wednesday, and your scores will also be e-mailed.” He looked around again and smiled, “And just think, in a few months one or two of you may be clerking for a Supreme Court Justice. If you did well enough.”

Sheila just shook her head, gathered her things, stood, and followed the others out the door. I wish.

* * * * *

“You’re late!” Larry stood in the doorway of the dressing room, his fat face bright red and glistening with sweat. From behind him, the bump and grind of the music told her how long she had to finish getting ready. Plenty of time because Lily would finish and then Debi would take over.

Sheila didn’t do more than look over as she slipped the fine net stocking over her toes. “I told you I had my last mid-term today and that I’d be late.”

He advanced into the room. Three months earlier she would have been both repulsed and frightened. Now she was bored.

She slid the sheath higher, taking care not to snag a fingernail on it. He wouldn’t do anything to her, and he wouldn’t fire her. As Bambi Bedlight she was one of his biggest draws. The butt, boobs and baby-blues that made her professors to disbelieve she also had a brain were her, and Larry’s, greatest assets. At her thigh, she clipped it into the garter and bent over to repeat the action with her left leg.

“You think you’re special.” Larry spat. “You’re not. You’re a whore, just like the rest of them. You’ll never get a job away from here.”

Still she ignored him, turning to the mirror and adjusting the skimpy bra, pushing the silver pasties down below the edge of the fabric.

He came closer still, until he was right behind her, his angry, piggy eyes glaring at her through the glass. “What makes you think you’re so special? You think I couldn’t stop you dead in your tracks? A word here, a picture there, you’d never get a job.”

She spun in a slow, deliberate motion, dismissing his threat with her action. “Yeah, you could do that, but that’s blackmail and that’s a crime. So you try it, Larry, just try it. I know about you and your little sideshow. The girls you bring into L.A. from Mexico for some of the pervs you call customers. You want to blackmail me, you go right ahead, but I’ll use the ashes of you, your reputation and your business to warm up my law career with the D.A.” She turned back to the mirror, picked up the lipstick and leaned forward to get a better look as she drew it on. She wasn’t naïve enough to ignore Larry, so watched him although her focus was on the line of her lips.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He hissed.

She did, though, so didn’t say anything. In a week she’d get her grades. She was confident in the test, she had studied hard and thought she had done well. Her application was ready and, as soon as she got the grade, she would attached a screenshot of it and send them off.

Debi’s music was getting close to the end. After another check, she straightened and stepped around Larry, heading for the long bar with its poles, spotlights and drunken patrons jacking off inside their britches.

* * * * *

“Don’t I know you from somewhere?” The light brown eyes squinted in concentration. “I’m sure I’ve seen you somewhere.”

She froze and swallowed, afraid that he had, that he’d seen a lot of her. If she wasn’t mistaken, he was one of the regulars at the club.

“Well, no matter. Have a seat. The others will be here in just a minute.” He sat down across the long table from her, his eyes not moving as he thought.

After a minute of shrieking nerves, she made a decision. Sliding forward on the chair she folded her hands on the polished wood. “I’ve never broken the law. I’ve never done anything criminal, but you might know me from my job.”

“Oh?”

She moved back, her stomach cramping. “I work at The Harem. I’m a dancer. It’s how I’ve paid my way through school.”

His jaw dropped as the blood surged into his cheeks and then drained.

“Look, I don’t want to do that for the rest of my life. I did it to earn money for school. If you don’t say anything, neither will I, but don’t disqualify me for this job because of that. Consider it a mistake, but if I get this job, I won’t go back there except to clear out my locker and get my last paycheck.”

It took a long minute while he thought, but then he smiled. “That’ll be a shame.”

She relaxed and confided, “I even have a case for you.”

 
* * * * *

So, there we have it. Not even four-thirty and my blog post is done, including minor edits to a short piece I put up on Saturday. Now, the coffee is ready and I'll go over and get to work on 'Shady'.

Have a lovely day!

Best~
Philippa

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/PhilippaStories